Dear Diary
by Anaiya Illyria
Summary: Buffy's Diary


**Dear Diary**

a Buffy the Vampire Slayer Fanfiction

March 10, 1997

Dear Diary,

Giles thinks I need to write down and keep track of all the slaying I do. I think that sounds like a bore, but I guess he's my watcher and this is the only thing he has asked of me so far. Of course, we only met today too. But I think this will be by far the easiest thing he'll ever ask of me.

But to back up, I started at a new school today, which wouldn't have been a big deal, except for the whole dead guy in the locker thing. I'm pretty sure a vampire killed him. I thought by coming to Sunnydale I'd be able to leave that behind. Apparently I was wrong.

The librarian turned out to be my new Watcher. He kinda freaked me out when we first met. I went into the library to get a book for my history class. He thought I was looking for some "vampyr" book. It was really weird. His name is Mr. Giles, he used to be the curator of a museum in England. Big deal.

All I can say is I hope he is more understanding about having friends than Merrick was. I mean, after all I am sixteen, and friends are very important at my age. Sometimes I think grown-ups forget that.

I met a couple kids from the popular group at school. They all seem so shallow, especially the leader, Cordelia. She wanted me to take a test to see if I was cool enough to hang out with them. And the questions were ridiculous. In the big scheme of things, who cares about nail polish, James Spader, frappucinos, or John Tesh? I can't believe I ever acted that way although I'm sure I probably did back at Hemery, since I supposedly passed the test.

I ate lunch with Willow, Xander, and Jesse. Willow seems really nice. And she can help me with my homework, and since getting kicked out of school for failing all my classes doesn't sound like fun, I think this might be the better choice in friends. Also they seem to be the type that doesn't have much of a social life, so I should fit in great – since I can't really have one if I'm going to continue slaying.

I'm pretty sure Xander has a crush on me, but I don't know how I feel about that yet. I mean, I am just the new girl in school, maybe it will wear off after I'm not such a novelty anymore. I think Jesse likes Cordelia, but somehow I don't really think that that relationship is ever going to get off the ground. I fear that Jesse is going to end up heartbroken before it ends.

I thought I'd already made the decision to quit, but seeing that dead kid today, knowing that if I'd patrolled last night I might have saved him, I'm just not sure I can sit back and let the demons win. But am I willing to throw away my life, to save someone else?

March 11, 1997

Dear Diary,

So I went to this club last night, The Bronze, which apparently is the only cool place in town to hang out. And on the way there, I met this amazingly gorgeous guy. Not sure who he is but he said he wanted to warn me. He was really mysterious, which only added to how cute he was. He said something about the harvest coming soon. Whatever that means.

I did the most shocking and embarrassing thing last night. I committed social suicide, but not on purpose. I tried to stake Cordelia. She was just in the wrong place at the wrong time, but now she thinks I'm a freak. Oh well, I guess it's a good thing I didn't plan on becoming her friend anyway. She's such a bitch.

And as if that wasn't enough, then I had to rescue Jesse and Willow from vampires. The vampires led them to some crypt in the middle of one of the local cemeteries. And Xander already knows, cause he overheard Giles and I talking in the library. So now my secret isn't even secret anymore. Everyone knows. Or at least that's what it feels like to me. Hopefully they'll forget or I can just convince them he was on drugs or something. That's what most people seem to do. They just forget about the things that go bump in the night. But as for having any friends, I guess that's out of the question. I couldn't risk putting them in danger like that all the time. God, could my life get any worse?

As for the vampires that attacked Willow and Xander, I dusted two of the four. One of them was really really strong. And he attacked from out of nowhere. He's one of the two that got away. The other must have run off while I was trying to stake him. I have this feeling that I'm going to have to fight him again.

March 12, 1997

Dear Diary,

I successfully stopped the harvest, but not everyone made it out okay.

R.I.P. Jesse McNalley

March 13, 1997

Dear Diary,

During school yesterday, I figured out that the big vampire who attacked me in that crypt had to have come from behind me, so I left intending on going down through the sewer to attack the vampires head on. I thought maybe I'd get lucky and kill this "master" that the strong vampire had been talking about.

Once I got back to the crypt where I saved Xander and Willow, the cute mysterious guy was there. His name is Angel, but that's about all the personal information he'd give me. He tried to warn me about the harvest again. Then said he couldn't actually be of any help, cause he was scared. Go figure. The cute guy, who already knows about vampires and stuff, is too scared to fight them.

After I made it into the sewer, I found Xander following me. He didn't even bring any weapons, just followed me into the sewer. He said the part of his brain that would have told him to bring weapons was too busy telling him not to follow me. He should have listened to it. I guess I can have friends and slay after all. As long as they don't get killed.

Well then we found vampire Jesse, and tried to save him. But the vampires were using him as bait, and we were too late. Xander didn't really understand that Jesse wasn't Jesse anymore, and well as much as I tried to explain it, I'm still not sure he understands. We barely made it out of there with our lives.

After school, Giles explained that the harvest was supposed to happen that night. He said the harvest involved one of the master's minions acts as his vessel and sucks people dry until the master is strong enough to break free of his prison. Mostly it doesn't matter what they're doing, I'm just supposed to kill them. We figured they'd go to the Bronze because that's where all the teens in Sunnydale hang out. I headed home to get some weapons and had a fight with my mom, about me going out again. She's afraid I'm going to get kicked out of school and start causing trouble again. I really hate lying to her. But I had to save the world. So I left through the window after she'd closed my door. I'm probably going to be grounded for life.

Long story short, Bad Guys – 0 Buffy – 1.


End file.
